“God’s Tapestry” – The conversation about racial reconciliation continues. Clergy and other parishioners engage this vital but challenging conversation about race and God’s mission of reconciliation in light of recent events in Ferguson, Mo., Baltimore, Md., and Charleston, S.C.
Facilitators (9:30 a.m.): The Reverend Ollie V. Rencher, The Reverend Joslyn Ogden Schaefer
Guidelines for Communication Across Difference based on work by VISIONS, Inc.
1. “Try on” new ideas and perspectives.
2. It’s okay to disagree.
3. It’s not okay to shame, blame or attack.
4. Practice self-focus – as much as possible use “I-statements” instead of “We” or “They.”
5. Notice both process (how we say things, who is saying things) and content (what is being said).
6. Practice “both/and” thinking. More than one thing can be true at the same time.
7. Be aware of both the intent and the impact of your message. Be willing to give and receive feedback about the impact of our words upon others. Be willing to say “ouch” and explain why something didn’t sit well with you.
8. Confidentiality – Please don’t share details of another person’s story outside the group. You are encouraged to share your story and general perspective and learnings from the course.
9. It’s okay to be messy.
St. Peter’s Parish Vision [is to become]
a community of bold followers of Jesus;
a crowd that effects good change for the world;
a place known for radical love and welcome; and
a beacon of hope in Center City Charlotte.
Background for Reconciliation Work in the Life of St. Peter’s
The mystery of creation and the human condition calls each of us to understand and celebrate differences that make each of us who we are as God’s beloved children, made equally in the image of God (imago Dei). Regardless of our natural cautions and generalizations, inherited perspectives, and even experience-based positions about the “other,” reconciliation is a central aspect of “An Outline of the Faith commonly called the Catechism” in The Book of Common Prayer. Specifically, we are reminded [Catechism] that the “mission of the Church” is to “restore all people to unity with God and each other in Christ.”
Rooted in The Baptismal Covenant, Episcopal Christians and all people, for that matter, are invited (and vow) to: strive for justice and peace among all people, and respect the dignity of every human being; seek and serve Christ in all persons, loving our neighbor as ourselves; proclaim the by word and example the Good News of God in Christ; and persevere in resisting evil, and, whenever we fall into sin, repent and turn to the Lord.” All of this is vowed to be done “with God’s help.” More than ever, the world needs the Church, the body of Christ, to lead the change that the world both needs and desires, but quite easily and naturally does not know where to begin the journey of reconciliation.
After St. Peter’s March 6-8 Lenten Reconciliation Retreat Weekend facilitated by the Rev. Dr. William Kondrath, author of God’s Tapestry: Understanding and Celebrating Differences, parishioner Jim Bartos posted the following on March 23 on St. Peter’s “God’s Tapestry” Blog (www.st-peters.org)
“Ouch,” she said. Barely had the Lenten retreat at St. Peter’s concluded. There was the usual post-event chatter in the parish hall. Participants were lining up to thank the retreat leader, Dr. Bill Kondrath, for challenging and (yes) entertaining us. It was good. And thanking Joslyn for making it happen. And saying good-bye to the familiar and the brand new friends. And then she said “Ouch” to me and the two of us, in our own mini-retreat, added a coda on an informative, thoughtful event. Did I say challenging? My new friend, a St. Peter’s member whom I had seen at Sunday Eucharist many times, but always from a distance and never spoken to before, put into practice one of the guidelines for the retreat: be aware of intent and impact, and when the impact hurts say “Ouch” and so she did and so we both learned. I learned that no matter what I meant or did not mean, what I do/say can cause pain in another. And not necessarily wanting to speak for anyone else (another learning that weekend), I rather suspect she learned how courageous she could be to admit her vulnerability to a relative stranger (me). So we talked, and learned, and grew. And it was very good. — Jim Bartos
Questions to Guide Our Conversation on May 31
1. As you reflect on the various reports of racial injustice and unrest, particularly in light of recent police-involved shootings, what Biblical stories come to mind?
2. What feelings have you had or do you have now when we think about this issue or hear about these news stories?
3. What do you “do” with your feelings?
4. Where do you see hope in the neighborhood, local, state or national context? How do you think God’s Spirit is moving among us to enable reconciliation?